I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
