i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Mom said you looked used
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize