oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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