Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
