i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
