The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
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