my text book just quoted the cookie monster
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
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