I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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