I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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