This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
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There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
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