I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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