So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
