There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
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you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
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How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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