I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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