And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
