If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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