i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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