she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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