Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Randomize
