5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
