my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Randomize
