I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
