I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.