but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
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Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
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You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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