u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize