you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
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