I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I can't turn off my feet"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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