People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
