I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
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we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
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I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.