Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Oh yea! I was just doing that too!

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(310): View more from California

Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.

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(970): View more from Colorado

I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.

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(585): View more from New York

okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(914): View more from New York

we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures

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(808): View more from Hawaii

Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"

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(916): View more from California

WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.

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