Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
