its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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