that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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