In the future we'll all be gay
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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