She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
