I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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