You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
