Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Let's paint friendship bongs
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
