I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
