He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
