well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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