Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
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she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
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No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
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