Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize