my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
i out mim tonsoeep
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