first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
