I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
