I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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