also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize