You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
