Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I have fence marks all over my body
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
