You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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