i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
